Monday, December 21, 2009

Guest Post - Christmas Terror

This list supplied by Molly Hodgdon (aka Undead Molly)

By this time of the month you might be ready for some non-traditional Christmas movie fare. I love yuletide, but I will admit to feeling like all I want for Christmas is a sniper rifle and a clock tower sometimes. The music... the crazy-eyed shopping hoards... constant SPEND SPEND SPEND propaganda assaulting my senses.

Here are some of my picks (all available at Waterfront Video, of course) for a delightfully twisted holiday season.

Gremlins: Most people remember the creatures and The Rules (no food after midnight, don't get them wet, don't let light hit them), but I'm surprised how many people forget that Gremlins is also a Christmas movie! If you haven't seen Joe Dante's fun, funny, scary classic in awhile you should definitely check it out and make it part of your Christmas tradition.

Tales from the Crypt: Season 1, Episode 2: Robert Zemeckis directed this short but sweet santa slasher vignette. It's worth watching just for the Crypt Keeper's awesomely horrible puns.

Jack Frost: There are two movies titled "Jack Frost" about snowmen who are mystically infused with human spirit and brought to life. If you want to see one of the most ridiculous, infamous, and unique shower murder scenes in horror movie history, make sure you're renting the 1996 version written and directed by Michael Cooney, not the 1998 Michael Keaton family feel-good rubbish. You can also rent the sequel for a killer snowman marathon if you think you can handle it.

Christmas Nightmare:
A young couple is in danger when the spirit of a long ago murderer possesses the FBI agent who is supposed to be protecting them.

Black Christmas: (1974) It's not just one of my favorite Christmas horror movies, it's one of my favorite slasher films in general. It is considered by many (including me) to be important to the evolution of the slasher genre and I frankly don't think Halloween would ever have been made if John Carpenter hadn't been inspired by it. If you only check out one film on this list, let it be this one!

Black Christmas: (2006) It's a remake of the 1974 original. It's, um... a remake.

Two Front Teeth: This is a totally fun no-budget wackadoo horror flick! What they lacked in funds they sure did make for in enthusiasm. You will not find a more elaborately weird plot or more Christmas-themed sexual double entendres anywhere.

Silent Night, Deadly Night: The name kind of says it all, doesn't it? The story of Billy, the lonely orphan who grows up to be a very merry spree killer. Very controversial when it was released in 1984 because it was the first mainstream film to portray someone costumed as St. Nick stabbing folks. It was condemned by national child advocacy groups and every major critic including Leonard Maltin who said, "What's next, the Easter Bunny as a child molester?". Rent this nasty Christmas classic and have an eggnog toast to the progress of cinematic degeneracy.

Merry Christmas everybody!

1 comment:

MGP said...

First, a small plug for me...

Good list. There's also Silent Night, Bloody Night, which has its moments. Black Christmas is up there and has some genuinely creepy moments, which you've no doubt noticed.

One that's missing from this list and is probably my favorite is Christmas Evil. We'll most likely do a Terror Transmission episode on this one come Xmas 2010.